Therefore, I will just comment a little on this sin. In confession, you often hear about betrayal, but the saddest thing is how a person talks about his betrayal. There is a childish naivety in the words. It is sometimes surprising that an adult can say this. “My wife doesn’t understand me. We have been living like strangers for a long time, just under the same roof. But she (my mistress) understands me, she is a very sensitive person, and I feel so at ease with her.”
Or you often hear from a single woman who is dating a married man: “He is so attentive and caring, but their relationship with his wife is strained, she does not understand him, but he is very good. He won’t leave his family, of course, and I don’t want to destroy it.”
In fact, everything is very simple. The fact that they don’t understand him at home is a lie. The fact that someone stranger understands him more than someone at home is also not true. The fact that he is caring and attentive is self-deception. A person cannot be caring if he cheats! A mistress cannot understand a man more than his own wife! Simply caring for a stranger, meeting him for two or three hours, and not every day, is ten times easier than caring for your wife. Being nice for a short period of time with your lover is easy. To be a caring husband and father, that is, to be ready to show your care 24 hours a day, is already a feat. A person does not want to carry out this feat, but he wants to be loved and pleased. This is how mistresses appear. But they appear only from the inability of the traitor to truly love. The wife may not be at all to blame for her husband’s betrayal; it is not she who does not understand him, but he himself is to blame for not being able to love her. She (the wife) understands this dislike of her husband, but he (the husband) calls it misunderstanding. He needs him to lie on the sofa, and his wife to obey, please and at the same time understand him.
(From the book “Once in a lifetime” by priest Ilya Shugaev)
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